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from angry to being heard

5/30/2014

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In 1999 I was the single mother of five children, had spent two years homeless and many more struggling to make ends meet for my family. I was a board member of the Homelessness Project in Seattle when I was invited to participate in the Center for Ethical Leadership’s three-day Confluence on “Closing the Income Gap in the Puget Sound Region.” I accepted, but I didn’t know what to expect. I was still angry about some of the experiences I lived through, and didn’t think there were many people who cared.

Once I got to the event, I found myself in dialogue with business people, government agency representatives, educators and religious leaders, all of whom cared deeply but had different ideas about how to approach the issue of poverty. I was able to speak of my own experiences and felt heard and understood for the first time.

Gracious Space enabled strangers to come together to talk about important issues that don’t normally get addressed. Classism, racism, age differences, financial differences – all these play a role in ending poverty. Some people thought they were helping but were able to see they were really missing the mark. I learned to be more open-minded instead of angry, and found a more respectful way to express my experiences and bring my knowledge to the table.

I still understand the anger of people who want to fight for a better life, but I also know now that most people in the world are not intentionally hurtful. If we let go of our fears and stereotypes we can change things without having to fight – and this is what Gracious Space allowed us to do. I like to create an atmosphere free of insecurity and fear and see everyone pumped up. Gracious Space helped me see what’s really going on and how I can make a difference.
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    Shelia Proby

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